A Spider is In-Love with Me!

A reader recently asked me about this interesting spider dream.

Dear Cynthia,

I have a question about a dream that I have. I looked online but I can't find the answer. A spider attached itself to me. Every time the owner took the spider away the spider would spin a web, come back to me and land on my head. It did not attack me or anything like that. It was just in-love with me, I guess. What does that really mean?

~Shawanda Harris

Dear Shawanda,

I am so curious to know if you have an admirer who is possibly married, engaged “belongs to” or is otherwise committed to someone else, yet they keep flirting or want to come back to you?

In the language of dreams, a spider can represent manipulation because they weave their beautiful webs to catch their prey, their food. Poisonous spiders can represent toxic relationships, but in yours dream the spider just goes for your head. It's as if someone keeps wanting you to think of them, remember them, and so on.

If this does not apply, ask yourself: Do I feel manipulated by anyone, or, am I manipulating someone? A parent or friend may be trying to impose their agenda into your life. Or, you may be overly controlling to someone else.

If you fear spiders in your waking life, they can represent fear to you. Ask yourself: What condition, situation or person am I afraid of and what can I do to reassure or protect myself.

Additionally, if you are a collector of spiders, study or adore them, they could represent those activities and/or feelings as well.

Shawanda, please let me know if this is helpful.

Until next time, all my best wishes for your Sweet Dreams!

Cynthia

Disaster Dreams

I recently received this message on my Dream Power Facebook page:

Dear Cynthia,

I absolutely love, love your Dream Power page! However...I had a dream last night that the apocalypse happened...the sky was red...earthquakes were happening...my cousin was with me...I was in a crowd and the lights went out...she kept telling me to hold her hand because there were dead people in the bathroom...none of it made any sense and I woke up in a cold sweat, hyperventilating...sorry to bother you with this...but I keep having apocalyptic dreams...any advice?











Annalea Jones

Dear Annalea,

While a small percentage of dreams do come true, most disaster dreams refer to a challenging situation in the dreamers waking life. Since your cousin was with you in the dream, I would start by asking: where in your family life do you sense a life changing disruption? 

Dead people in the bathroom, sounds so unsettling, but if we interpret the symbols involved, we can gain some clarity. Symbolically this is saying that things that were once alive are now dead. Perhaps this could represent a relationship that is ending or anything that is coming to an end. Bathrooms are where we purge or dispose of that which no longer serves us, it is also where we wash ourselves clean. 

The lights went out, which makes us ask, where in your waking life is there an absence of awareness? Is someone lying or covering something up? Your subconscious mind is alerting you that an earth shattering change is occurring in your life. The good news is that you are fine! You survive and even assist your cousin, a very good sign.

Ultimately, life is about change. And even when initially we do not choose it, if we ask ourselves two questions: what can I learn from this and how can I grow as a result of this? Most often, we will benefit from the answers.

All my best wishes to you,

Cynthia Richmond

I'm Being Chased!

The most common nightmare for both adults and children includes the theme of being chased. Typically the dreamer does not know the potential assailant but they do feel very threatened by them. Many wake up with their heart racing, gasping for breath and are so relieved to realize that the danger was only in the dream. For adults the chaser can be anything that is after them in waking life, something gaining on them; a deadline, an addiction, a woman's biological clock, their own pressure to lose weight or any similar self-imposed issue. For children the whole world seems so large and out of their personal control. Nightmares can include monsters, the Big Bad Wolf, authority figures, a faceless "bad guy" or the disciplinarian parent.

Nightmares reflect our fears and anxieties. Bad dreams can sometimes be a symptom of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) for those who have been through trauma. It seems so unfair to have to continue being haunted by something terrible that happened in the past. Talk therapy with a trained counselor can go a long way to stop these disturbing dreams.

If you have a nightmare ask yourself what am I afraid of? Where in my waking life am I not measuring up to my goals? Is there a bully I can make arrangements to avoid? What actions can I take to regain control of my life? Make a new plan to take back the reigns in your life.

If you realize that you are having a nightmare while you are experiencing it, you can turn toward the chaser and ask he or she what they want.

It is normal to have an occasional nightmare. They may be our most important dreams in the sense that their vivid nature helps us to remember them as well as face our fears so we can live with more peace.

Until next time, I wish you Sweet Dreams,

Cynthia

Intentionally Repeating a Dream

Have you ever incubated a dream or put yourself back into a dream you experienced previously?

As a kid, in a family that celebrated Christmas, I had quite a responsibility. I was the oldest of five children. Which made me the responsible kiddo. I held the other kids hands walking in parking lots, was left to babysit them when both parents were at work, and so on. 

The year I was 10, I was so excited about Christmas. We had decorated the tree and the whole house. I had bought and wrapped gifts for my family members, it was all so much fun. Everyone was in a good mood. Our grandparents, aunts and uncles and cousins were coming over the next day for dinner.

It was so stimulating that I couldn't get to sleep. And of course, Santa doesn't come until all the kids are asleep, everyone knows that! If I couldn't get to sleep I would single-handedly ruin Christmas for my entire family.

Finally I was asleep and having a nightmare. In it my mom and siblings were in a grocery store. With five children my mom had a rule, we always had to be holding hands with one or two of the other kids. In my dream, I was alone and separated from my family. The shelves were all very high, I couldn't see or find them. I was going to be in trouble and I was scared, but even more frightened to be lost and alone.

Then I woke up! It was Christmas morning! I was not lost or in trouble.

The following Christmas, once again I was excited and couldn't get to sleep. It dawned on me that I could intentionally re-dream the grocery store dream. It had been really scary but this time I would know that it was just a dream and I would wake up and it would be Christmas! It worked! I re-dreamed the dream, but it was lucid, I knew that it was just a dream, I tried to play along with the previous "script" all-the-while knowing it was all okay.

If you have a favorite dream or dream theme, such as flying, remember the dream and the feelings you had in it as you drift to sleep. It's very likely that you can revisit that lovely dreamscape.

Until next time, I wish you sugarplums dancing in your dreamy head,

~ Cynthia

Teeth Falling Out!

The fifth most common dream that people report having is one in which, some or all of their teeth are loose, falling out or missing. Sometimes the dreams are so vivid that the person has to check their mouth when they wake up just to be certain it isn't true.

This is actually one of the first recorded dreams in history. Artemidorus, a Greek philosopher, wrote the earliest known book on the interpretation of dreams in the 2^nd century B.C. The treatise, Oneirocritica (Interpretation of Dreams), was written in sections in which, Artemidorus talks about metaphor and symbolism in dreams as well as the need to understand the dreamer, his or her beliefs and culture, to properly understand the personal meaning of a dream. He said that a dream of teeth falling out typically reflected a fear of death, since in the animal kingdom when a being looses its teeth, it can no longer procure food, eat or defend itself and therefore it dies. 

In a more modern context, dreams of teeth falling out are often demonstrating a concern about physical appearance or a fear about something that has been communicated and may have been misunderstood or could reflect badly on the dreamer. 

Of course, as with all dreams, one should first rule out the literal; your subconscious mind could be letting you know that a visit to the dentist is in your best interest. A dentist wrote to me a few years back alerting me that several of his patients with T.M.J.,  (Temporomandibular Joint and Muscle Disorder) had dreams of their teeth falling out, and it was their dream that prompted them to make a dental appointment.

If you are not in need of dental attention, ask yourself:

• Have I been thinking about or fearing death? What can I do to feel more safe or healthier?
• Or: What can I do to improve my appearance and feel better about how I look?
• Or: In which communications am I feeling vulnerable? What can I do to clear the air?

If any of these questions feels like an "Ah ha!" moment, explore it further.

Until next time, I wish you warm regards and sweet dreams,

~Cynthia

I'm Flying!

It is exhilarating. I merely take a few steps forward
with my arms outstretched and I am airborne!

Have you ever had a flying dream? They are among the top-five most common dreams, and dreamers love having them.

Flying dreams help us “rise above” the gravity of our daily waking lives. They can assist us in finding a new perspective or way of looking at a situation. Dreams of taking flight offer stress management, fun and peaceful soaring, most dreamers love them.

Years ago, I was a guest on The View, a television program created and initially hosted by Barbara Walters, now by Whoopi Goldberg. One of the times I was a guest, we discussed the topic of dreams and Meredith Vieira shared that she had a recurring nightmare that she was in a passenger jet that was out of control and heading down. In her terrifying dream the plane does land and she is able to walk off the plane with no injuries.

My interpretation was as follows: In the language of dreams, Air represents the mental, our thoughts. Land represents what we know for sure; consciousness, we can see it feel it, stand on it. And Water (i.e., oceans, lakes) represent the unconscious or what is below the surface. Moving up is typically good; we are rising in stature, getting promoted, our investments are increasing. Headed down, especially in a plane is not so good.

I told Meredith that this was a natural thought and feeling in her line of work as a television journalist and talk show host. As a passenger on the plane and not the pilot, she realized that she was not in control of her ratings or public approval. A natural fear would be that ratings could go down and her career could crash. However her dream demonstrates that she will always be okay, she walks off the crashed plane unscathed.

As a journalist, Meredith has had to report on plane crashes and (in reality) she is not fond of flying. However, her dream referred to her career and as predicted she is flying high with her own fabulous talk show.

She was so kind and lovely to me and I wish her all the best, always.

Wishing you every best wish for flying high in your dreams,

~Cynthia

Test Day, Oh No!

One of the most common dreams across the board, both genders, all cultures, all ages and so on, is the dream that you are at school, it’s test day, you haven’t studied, can’t find the classroom, can’t find your locker or remember the combination, and a multitude of other variations on this theme.

Have you had that one? Most of us have. I find that so fascinating. People say, “I haven't been in school for decades—why did I have that dream?”

The dream takes other forms as well. When Simon & Schuster sent me on book tour for Dream Power: How to Use Your Night Dreams to change Your Life, I got to visit eight cities across this wonderful country of ours. I was privileged to hear dreams from so many people; I would probably never have met otherwise. Morning drive radio jocks had their version of this dream. For them it was the “Dead Air” dream. Their test so-to-speak was that they had failed the radio station by allowing dead air or silence. They were either in the men’s room, couldn’t find a tape or CD, went out of the building for a smoke and the door locked them out of their studio and other disasters.

New York’s Maurice DuBois interviewed me several times, telling me of his version of this dream. In it, this dapperly dressed journalist could not find a tie! A suit and tie were required, of course, to report the news or interview a guest and he would wake panicked. By the way, I adored working with him and found him to be an exceptional interviewer and broadcaster.

So! What does this dream mean?
What is it trying to tell us?

This dream shows up in the lives of adults, much past academic pursuits, at a time when they feel as if they are being tested and that there will be a consequence that could be dismal. This could be anything you really care about; meeting your potential future in-laws, facing a job interview, asking an online date for an in-person meeting, or something else of major consequence.

This dream reflects a mild anxiety. So! What should you do if you have such a dream? Ask yourself : “What can I do to relieve my fear in this situation? Can I prepare better?”

Stash a back up tie in your desk drawer? Add your potential future mother-in-law’s favorite flowers to the table? You get the idea. Ask, where am I being tested? How can I get an A or 100%?

In the near future I will share the remaining top three most common dreams. We’ve already discussed “Naked in Public.”

Until next time, I wish you every best wish for your sweet dreams,

~ Cynthia